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135 <div class="panel-body">
136 <h1>
136 Later Life Letters
136 </h1>
143 <div class="well">
144 <p class="bold">
144 SCOPE OF THIS CHAPTER
144 </p>
145 The later life letter is written by child's social worker, and will be given to child when
they are considered old enough by their adoptive parent(s). It is an expanded version of the
145 <a href="g_life_story_book.html">
145 Life Story Books Guidance
145 </a>
145 and gives more detail of the child's history and the decision making process.
146 </div>
155 <div class="section">
156 <h2 id="introduction">
156 1. Introduction
156 </h2>
157 <p>
157 Later Life Letters are written by the child's social worker to a child who is being adopted,
with the aim of helping the child understand their past, increase their self esteem and
strengthen their resilience. The letter is given to the prospective adopters at an
appropriate time after the Adoption Order is made - usually within 10 working days of the
adoption ceremony, i.e. the ceremony to celebrate the making of the adoption order. The
adopters should then give the letter to the child at an appropriate time in the future.
157 </p>
158 </div>
159 <div class="section1">
159 </div>
165 <div class="section">
165 <h2 id="purpose_letter">
165 2. Purpose of the Later Life Letter
165 </h2>
166 <p>
166 The Later Life Letter should explain the child's history from birth and provide an
explanation of why they were adopted, including the reasons why they could not live with
their birth family.
166 </p>
167 <p>
167 The child is the focus of the letter and it must be remembered when writing the letter that
the child has a need to know why they were placed for adoption. The letter should be able to
give the child a personal sense of their own history and a sense of their value and worth,
something that a court report or the Child's Permanence Report (CPR) cannot provide.
167 </p>
168 <p>
168 The letter should, whenever possible, include the views of all the people involved in the
adoption process, including the birth family.
168 </p>
169 <p>
169 Remember that every child will see the letter at a different age, and so the letter, whilst
being truthful, must be written so that a child can understand it.
169 </p>
170 <p>
170 Our expectation would be that the child sees the letter when they are around 10-12 years,
but the final decision on timing is at the discretion of the adoptive parents. In very
difficult situations (e.g. incest, mental health problems, abuse) it may be better to write
two letters. The second one for when the child is in their mid-teens, and better able to
understand their history.
170 </p>
171 The letter is in addition to the child's Life Story Book and should never be a substitute for
the book -
171 <a href="g_life_story_book.html">
171 Life Story Books Guidance
171 </a>
171 . The main difference between the Later Life Letter and the Life Story Book lies in the depth
of the detail being shared with the child. Thus, more detailed and sensitive information
should be included in the Later Life letter as the letter will be shared with the child at a
later age when they are emotionally able to understand and deal with the information.
171 </div>
172 <div class="section1">
172 </div>
178 <div class="section">
178 <h2 id="what_important">
178 3. What is important? Everything!
178 </h2>
179 <p>
179 The information may be lost if not gathered together now. Experience shows that adult
adoptees are eager for information collected at this time, even if it is painful.
179 </p>
180 <p>
180 The letter can be personalised by the social worker who knew the birth parents and the child
at the time of the placement.
180 </p>
181 <p>
181 Be confident - don't be intimidated by the task. It is difficult but not impossible and
important for the child / young person in terms of their identity.
181 </p>
182 You have all the information you need. Think of yourself as an adopted person, what
information would you want, what questions would you ask your birth parents?
182 </div>
183 <div class="section1">
183 </div>
189 <div class="section">
189 <h2 id="there_no_right">
189 4. There is no Right or Wrong way to do This
189 </h2>
190 <p>
190 The attached are only to be used as
190 <a href="#example_one">
190 examples
190 </a>
190 - to give you ideas. What you produce will have to be something that you feel comfortable
in producing, in each case the written style of the social worker and the information
available will be different. Try to avoid copying information from social work documents;
the letter needs to be personal to the child.
190 </p>
191 It is a good idea to write the letter in sections, for instance the legal situation could be
separate from the more personal information. Initially adopters and the adopted child will
need a simple explanation to share with their family and friends. As stated earlier, in very
difficult situations it is a good idea to have two letters.
191 </div>
192 <div class="section1">
192 </div>
198 <div class="section">
198 <h2 id="what_information">
198 5. What Information Should be Included?
198 </h2>
199 <h3>
199 5.1 Beginning the letter
199 </h3>
200 <ul>
201 <li>
201 Begin by introducing yourself;
201 </li>
202 <li>
202 Acknowledge that some time will have passed before the letter is read and that the child
may not remember you;
202 </li>
203 <li>
203 Talk about your role in relation to the child, the length of your involvement, and the
reason for writing the letter;
203 </li>
204 <li>
204 Mention other previous significant social workers who were involved (if that is the case)
- give their names, and when and why they were involved;
204 </li>
205 <li>
205 Acknowledge that it might be difficult for the young person to read the letter and that
they can ask of help from their adoptive parents while reading it.
205 </li>
206 </ul>
207 <h3>
207 5.2 Write about the mother's pregnancy and the child's birth
207 </h3>
208 <p>
208 It is important to include as much information possible about the mother's pregnancy and the
child's birth. This is often the information that children would like to know.
208 </p>
209 <p>
209 Include:
209 </p>
210 <ul>
211 <li>
211 Date and time of birth;
211 </li>
212 <li>
212 Name of the hospital;
212 </li>
213 <li>
213 Weight;
213 </li>
214 <li>
214 Experience of pregnancy;
214 </li>
215 <li>
215 Length of labour;
215 </li>
216 <li>
216 Type of delivery;
216 </li>
217 <li>
217 Time spent in the hospital with birth mother;
217 </li>
218 <li>
218 Who was present;
218 </li>
219 <li>
219 What happened next?
219 </li>
220 <li>
220 Who cared for the child after their birth?
220 </li>
221 </ul>
222 <h3>
222 5.3 Include Information about the Child's Life Before and After Care
222 </h3>
223 <p>
223 It is important to include all facts related to:
223 </p>
224 <ul>
225 <li>
225 Where the child lived – include names of caregivers, addresses, dates, description of
caregivers and their family and talk about why they had to move;
225 </li>
226 <li>
226 Names and descriptions of any nurseries or schools attended;
226 </li>
227 <li>
227 The child's development milestones – such as when they said their first words, had their
first tooth, took their first steps, learned to read;
227 </li>
228 <li>
228 The child's particular characteristics, sayings, activities, interests at various stages;
228 </li>
229 <li>
229 Details of any child's friends and pets.
229 </li>
230 </ul>
231 <h3>
231 5.4 Describe the Birth Family Members
231 </h3>
232 <p>
232 It is important to focus on those family members who have had the most significant
relationships with the child and had an influence on the child's experience. Details of
other family members who were not significant to the child's experience could be found in
the CPR or in the genogram and the letter can refer to these additional sources if
necessary.
232 </p>
233 <p>
233 What to focus on:
233 </p>
234 <ul>
235 <li>
235 The birth family's situation at the time you became involved in the case – where the
children were living (mention the house, surroundings, etc) and the situation of the birth
parents and siblings;
235 </li>
236 <li>
236 Describe the family members:
237 <ul>
238 <li>
238 First name;
238 </li>
239 <li>
239 Date and place of birth if known;
239 </li>
240 <li>
240 Their age when the child was born;
240 </li>
241 <li>
241 Ethnic origin;
241 </li>
242 <li>
242 Physical description, appearance and personality.
242 </li>
243 </ul>
244 </li>
245 <li>
245 Include as much information possible about birth parents:
246 <ul>
247 <li>
247 Their background and upbringing;
247 </li>
248 <li>
248 Academic and employment history;
248 </li>
249 <li>
249 Interests;
249 </li>
250 <li>
250 Health;
250 </li>
251 <li>
251 The parents relationship;
251 </li>
252 <li>
252 Use the term 'birth mother/father' to avoid confusion with adoptive parents.
252 </li>
253 </ul>
254 </li>
255 <li>
255 Include information about siblings if they were not placed together. Are they adopted? If
they live with birth parents, explain why. The child needs to know what happened to their
brothers and sisters, who cares for them, and if relevant, why there is no contact. Be
careful to give only first names for all birth relatives and do not use addresses or other
identifying information. Be mindful about the amount of information you include, it should
be long enough for the child to know what happened to their siblings, but remember that
the child is the focus of the letter.
255 </li>
256 </ul>
257 <h3>
257 5.5 Talk about reasons for adoption
257 </h3>
258 <p>
258 There will already be enough information to help describe the events that led to the child
being placed for adoption. However the key thing about the later life letter is that it
gives the opportunity to explain these events in a more personal way.
258 </p>
259 <p>
259 The following explanations are found to be the most common for why the birth parents could
not care for their children:
259 </p>
260 <ul>
261 <li>
261 Their parents were struggling with problems or troubles of their own;
261 </li>
262 <li>
262 Their parents have never learnt how to look after and care for others;
262 </li>
263 <li>
263 Their parents might be too ill;
263 </li>
264 <li>
264 Their parents may have been shown the wrong way to look after their children.
264 </li>
265 </ul>
266 <p>
266 It is important to include clear explanations of when and why the big decisions were made,
and who made them. The child needs to know the reason behind these decisions and need to
have a confirmation that the decision was in their interest and the best option for them.
266 </p>
267 <p>
267 The letter should also include, wherever possible the birth parent's attitude to the
adoption and their hope for the child's future.
267 </p>
268 <h3>
268 5.6 Explain how the family was chosen
268 </h3>
269 <p>
269 Write about:
269 </p>
270 <ul>
271 <li>
271 Some details of the adoptive family, including the process of choosing and the reasons for
choosing the current family;
271 </li>
272 <li>
272 The child's introduction to the adoptive family – the process of introductions, reactions,
etc.;
272 </li>
273 <li>
273 Date of moving to the new family;
273 </li>
274 <li>
274 Final visits with birth parents or other birth family members – mention who was involved,
where the visit/s took place, what happened, positive comments made and any gifts given.
274 </li>
275 </ul>
276 <p>
276 Talk to the adopters about the letter(s). When telling the child's story, it is important to
be positive as well as negative. We rely on the adopters passing on this information, so
involve them. Ask if you can talk about their hopes, fears and feelings at the time of the
introductory meetings and placements. Can you include the reason why they wanted to adopt?
276 </p>
277 <p>
277 Give details of how any agreed contact was decided - whether it is "face to face"
or Letter Box. The child needs to know that birth parents and other relatives want to hear
about their progress, and that the adoptive parents agreed to the contact arrangements prior
to placement.
277 </p>
278 <p>
278 When you have drafted the letter(s) in consultation with the adopters' social worker you
should show it/them to the adopters; they may have extra information that needs to be added.
They may also wish to ask for some amendments/different wording. They need to feel
comfortable with the content as this will be reflected in the way they help their child
later with its contents.
278 </p>
279 In the letters the birth parents should be called by their first names, and the adopters
described as "your parents".
279 </div>
280 <div class="section1">
280 </div>
286 <div class="section">
286 <h2 id="how_write">
286 6. How? Write it to the Child
286 </h2>
287 <p>
287 Have a look at the
287 <a href="#example_one">
287 examples
287 </a>
287 , and then be creative and imaginative.
287 </p>
288 <p>
288 You can write a letter or letters.
288 </p>
289 <p>
289 It could be a book.
289 </p>
290 <p>
290 It could be a loose leaf folder.
290 </p>
291 <p>
291 It could be a combination of all the above or anything else you feel is appropriate.
291 </p>
292 <p>
292 Remember the age at which you want the child to get this information and write it to the
child at that age.
292 </p>
293 <p>
293 Sometimes there should be two letters or if you use a loose leaf binder, sections could be
geared to different ages.
293 </p>
294 <p>
294 If the placement situation was difficult - e.g. there were legal problems, incest, rape,
abuse, they could be in a separate section to be seen later in the child's life. These
events need to be truthfully detailed.
294 </p>
295 <p>
295 The basic information needs to be given to the child as early as possible, and this should
include the true reason for the adoptive placement.
295 </p>
296 <p>
296 Brothers and sisters must have separate letters even when placed together, and this includes
twins.
296 </p>
297 <p>
297 You should also give the date the Adoption Order was granted, the name of the court, and the
names and office bases of all the social workers and family placement/adoption social
workers involved prior to and after the placement.
297 </p>
298 <p>
298 Date and sign the letter. Keep a copy on file and send the letter to the adopters' social
worker who will give it to the adopters, along with guidance on how to use the letter, and
explain their responsibilities in sharing the information with the child at a later date,
i.e. that the information should be made available to the child at a time the adopters
consider is appropriate, but no later than the child's 18th birthday.
298 </p>
299 <p>
299 The adopters should be asked for written confirmation of receipt of the letter and intention
to share the information with the child.
299 </p>
300 <p>
300 At the beginning of the letter introduce yourself. Acknowledge that some time will have
passed before the letter is read and that the child may not remember you. Talk about your
role in relation to the child, the length of your involvement, and the reason for writing
the letter. Mention other previous significant social workers who were involved (if that is
the case) - give their names, and when and why they were involved. Acknowledge that it might
be difficult for the person to read the letter and that they can ask of help from their
adoptive parents while reading it.
300 </p>
301 </div>
302 <div class="section1">
302 </div>
308 <div class="section">
308 <h2 id="letter">
308 7. Letter For an Adopted Child
308 </h2>
309 <h3 id="example_one">
309 Example 1 - Straightforward placement of child whose birth parents requested adoption
309 </h3>
310 <p>
310 CONFIDENTIAL (date and on headed paper)
310 </p>
311 <p>
311 Dear Anna
311 </p>
312 <p>
312 You might not remember me as you were very young when I met you. My name is Helen– you can
find a photo of me in your life story book, and I was your social worker when you were
little. A social worker is someone who helps parents to look after their children and if
they cannot do that, find new parents for those children.
312 </p>
313 <p>
313 I am writing this letter to you so that you can understand a bit about your past, the
reasons why you were adopted and how you came to live with your Mum and Dad and became Anna
Wood. I wrote this letter when you were little and I have tried to think of the questions
that you may have when you are older and I hope I haven't left anything out.
313 </p>
314 <p>
314 I knew Sarah and John, and you, right from the beginning of your life.
314 </p>
315 <p>
315 I first met Sarah when she was about seven months pregnant with you. She was living with her
mother, step-father, brother, sister and John, at her parents' home in West Yorkshire. All
the immediate family knew of her pregnancy, but no-one else. She lived in a small village
and her mother, at that time, ran a small business, so it was quite difficult to keep
"secrets".
315 </p>
316 <p>
316 When Sarah, and later John, came to see me it was clear that they wanted to do the very best
that they could for you. They were still students, had not lived together independently, and
did not feel ready to settle down and provide the sort of settled lifestyle they wanted for
you.
316 </p>
317 <p>
317 It was arranged that Sarah should go and live with foster carers, Sue and Mike, near
Wakefield. She remained with them for the last part of her pregnancy and briefly returned to
them after your birth. John got some relief work on a local farm, and lodgings nearby, so he
was in touch with Sarah during this time. Sarah's mother and step-father also visited
regularly. Sarah got on very well with Sue and when you were born on Wednesday, 20 October
2001, at 18.45 hours at Wakefield Maternity Hospital, Sue was present throughout your
delivery, having driven Sarah to Hospital. John and Sarah's mother also arrived later, so it
was quite a party!
317 </p>
318 <p>
318 Everything about your birth was normal and you weighed 2.805kgs. There is a photograph of
you taken shortly after your birth, which your parents will have shown you. You looked very
sweet and had lots of dark brown hair. Sarah had decided that she did not want to see you,
but she saw you as you were born. Sarah spent a few more hours in Hospital and went back to
Sue's house and stayed with her for 2 days.
318 </p>
319 <p>
319 You stayed in Hospital until 22 October, but Sue visited you during the time you were on
your own there. Sue and I took you home to her house, and you remained there until you moved
to live with your parents and Robert on 2nd December 2001. You were a very contented baby,
sleeping and feeding well, and you were given lots of cuddles by Sue and her family.
319 </p>
320 <p>
320 Sarah and John were involved in choosing your parents for you and they met them on the 26
November in my office. The meeting went well, although everyone was nervous. Sarah and John
had a clear idea of the sort of family they wanted you to be part of, and felt your parents
were exactly what they wanted for you.
320 </p>
321 <p>
321 Sarah and John said "goodbye" to you at Sue's house on the evening of 1 December
2001. The day before your parents took you home.
321 </p>
322 <p>
322 Let me tell you a little about Sarah and John.
322 </p>
323 <p>
323 Sarah was born on 16 November 1982. She was an attractive woman of 5ft 8ins tall, weighing
about 9 stone. She had long blondish/brown hair, blue/green eyes and the sort of skin that
tans easily. Sarah was a very friendly sort of person, not at all shy, and able to say
exactly what she thought. Sarah was very close to her family, and continued to live with
them for a long time after your birth. Sarah's family included her mother, Helen, her
stepfather, Peter, her full sister Elizabeth, who was born on 21 July 1984, and
half-brother, Michael born on 18 January 1987. Her step-father was a farm manager so she has
usually lived on farms. For a time her mother had a milk round as well as running a small
business.
323 </p>
324 <p>
324 Sarah attended school until she was 17 years old and left with GCSEs in English, Art,
German, Business Studies, Geography, Typing, Sociology and Biology. She thought about doing
"A" levels but decided to go to Agricultural College instead. She gained a Diploma
in Agriculture, and since then has worked in farming. She had ambitions to pursue this
career and get further qualifications.
324 </p>
325 <p>
325 Sarah's passion has always been horses, and she regularly hunts and participates at
"point to point" meetings. When I knew her she had two horses. She is interested
in all sports, especially Badminton and Tennis. She also belonged to the Pony Club and the
Local Young Farmers Group.
325 </p>
326 <p>
326 John was born on 17 September 1981. He is 5ft 9ins tall and weighs about 10 stone. He is
very slim. He has blue eyes and dark brown curly hair. He is a quiet and gentle person, very
friendly and easy-going.
326 </p>
327 <p>
327 John's family are farmers. He grew up living with his father, mother and two sisters, Kate,
who is two years older than him, and Julie who is 8 years younger. John was not so close to
his family as Sarah was to hers, and it was a long time before he told them about your
birth.
327 </p>
328 <p>
328 John left school at 16 with GCSEs in Maths, English, Science, Art and Design, Economics and
Metalwork. He then worked on his father's farm before attending Agricultural College. He
left College with a Certificate in Agriculture. When I knew him he was doing general farm
work for his father, Sarah's step-father and other farmers on a contract basis. Eventually
he expected to be much more involved in running his father's farm.
328 </p>
329 <p>
329 John's interests were horse-riding, pool, shooting, swimming, biking and cars. Like Sarah he
belonged to the Young Farmers and various other clubs.
329 </p>
330 <p>
330 I remember he liked cars and having a very "fast" journey with him and Sarah when
he went to meet Sue and Mike for the first time. Sarah was very cross and told him to slow
down, which he didn't.
330 </p>
331 <p>
331 Sarah and John met at College about 16 months before you were born. They had a lot in common
and got on very well. They remained friends after your birth.
331 </p>
332 <p>
332 Sarah and John both enjoyed being single, without responsibilities. They were quite
ambitious in their future careers, and neither wanted to settle down yet. The decision to
place you for adoption was made by both John and Sarah. They thought very seriously before
coming to this decision and never changed their minds. They both felt that, at this stage in
their lives, they could not offer the stability and security they wanted for you. They were
very happy when they became aware that your parents could offer you all the things they
wanted for you, and pleased that you could live with them and be adopted by them.
332 </p>
333 <p>
333 Your Adoption Order was made at Leeds County Court on 16 November 2003. You and all your
adoptive family and Jane Bloggs (your parents' social worker), and I all attended Court. It
was a very happy occasion and photos were taken - inside the Court with the Judge, and
outside the Court, I am sure you will have seen them.
333 </p>
334 <p>
334 I hope that what I have written in this letter will help you understand how you came to live
with your parents. Perhaps, after you have read this letter, you should discuss it with
them, as they will be able to help you sort out anything that seems unclear.
334 </p>
335 <p>
335 With all good wishes for the future.
335 </p>
336 <p>
336 Signed:
336 </p>
337 <p>
337 Social Worker or
337 </p>
338 Your usual work title.
339 <h3 id="example_two">
339 Example 2 - Letter where birth mother chose not to tell birth father about the child, the
birth mother continued to care for two older children.
339 </h3>
340 <p>
340 CONFIDENTIAL (Date and on headed paper)
340 </p>
341 <p>
341 Dear Simon
341 </p>
342 <p>
342 Your parents will already have told you a great deal about your adoption. I thought it might
be helpful if I wrote something down so that you can read about your birth parents and about
how it was that you came to be adopted.
342 </p>
343 <p>
343 You were born in Wakefield Hospital on 15 January 2001 at 4.27 in the morning. You weighed
2.940kgms, you were 48cms long and your head circumference was 33cms.
343 </p>
344 <p>
344 Your birth mother's name was Judith. She had come to Wakefield in September because she was
unhappy with where she lived. She knew that she was pregnant but told no-one about your
expected arrival until two weeks before you were born. The doctors thought that you were
probably 3 to 4 weeks early. Judith cuddled you just after you were born and after that you
were looked after in the Special Baby Unit. Judith came to say goodbye to you before she
left the Hospital later in the day. At the time you were very pink and wrinkly with big blue
eyes and lovely little chin. Everyone who saw you thought that you were a long skinny baby
with lovely fair hair.
344 </p>
345 <p>
345 Judith had only recently begun to plan for you because she'd recently been through a
difficult time so she asked her social worker if she could arrange for you to go and live
with another family until she was sure what was best for you. This family were foster carers
Beryl and Dennis. You went to stay with them on 19 January 2001 and stayed there until 14
May 2001.
345 </p>
346 <p>
346 Beryl and Dennis had a grown up family and you were quite a favourite with everyone. You
particularly liked to know what was going on and used to yell if you were left in the quiet.
346 </p>
347 <p>
347 Judith and I began to talk about whether adoption within her family would be a possibility
but although her older brother John and his family thought about it they felt, for lots of
reasons, that although they loved you, they wouldn't feel able to offer you what they wanted
for you.
347 </p>
348 <p>
348 It was after this that Judith decided to make sure that you had a very special family.
348 </p>
349 <p>
349 During this time Judith had lots of talks with her social worker, and myself, and finally
reached the conclusion that adoption by another family would be the best solution for you.
349 </p>
350 <p>
350 Judith was always sure that she loved you and wanted you to have a happy, settled family to
grow up in.
350 </p>
351 <p>
351 Judith, your birth mother, was born on 7 November 1968 in Coventry and when you were born
she was 33 years old. Judith was 5ft 3ins tall, slim with large blue/green eyes and her most
striking feature was her dark, curly red hair that she wore long. She was quietly spoken but
had strong views on things. Judith enjoyed school but left at 15 years without exams. She
enjoyed doing projects, particularly history. Judith had been close to her family as a young
child, but she found their restrictions difficult as she got older, she therefore left home
at 15.
351 </p>
352 <p>
352 At the time of your birth, her father, Tony, an engineer, was 55, her mother Doreen, was 56
and a housewife. Her older brother Steve was 35 years old. He worked as a bus and tram
driver in Blackpool. He lived with his wife and their daughter Clare, then 7 years old.
352 </p>
353 <p>
353 Judith's only sister was called Carol. She was 4 years older. She had three children - Mark
14, Debbie 12, and Anna aged 3 years. They were all living in Coventry - Judith's younger
brother, Ian, was working as a teacher in Liverpool. He and his wife had Susie aged 9 years.
353 </p>
354 <p>
354 By the time that I knew Judith, she had fallen out with her father, but she saw her mother
Doreen every week. Doreen was very concerned about what would happen to you and she bought a
teddy and I'm sure that your adoptive parents will have kept it safe for you.
354 </p>
355 <p>
355 After she left school, Judith lived with her sister but when she found herself pregnant with
Darren, born 18.3.87, she went back to live with her parents. She then met Joe. They had
Peter together, born 27.9.88. Unfortunately they weren't happy together. Joe was violent and
cruel and eventually Judith went with the children to live in a Women's Refuge in
Newcastle-on-Tyne.
355 </p>
356 <p>
356 It was during the time at Newcastle that she met your father. They were together for
sometime, but he became violent and so Judith left Newcastle for Wakefield. Your birth
father was called Colin. He was 29 years old at the time of your birth. He had light brown
straight hair with hazel eyes and a moustache. Judith had little contact with his family but
she said Colin had told her that his mother and father had split up when he was young.
He'd been a "bit of a lad" and had at one time attended a special school for children who
were having problems. Colin hadn't done well at school and had left school at 15 with no
exams. He had various jobs. At one time he was in the army, where he enjoyed parachuting. He
left the army because he hurt his back. Mostly he liked motorbikes.
356 </p>
357 <p>
357 After a short while of going out together Colin moved in to live with Judith, Darren and
Peter. Within a short time Judith realised she had made an awful mistake. She and Colin had
lots of rows and he was very unkind to them all. Eventually Judith felt that she had had
enough and came to Wakefield to a place that was found for her by Women's Aid. By this time,
Judith knew she was having you but decided not to tell Colin.
357 </p>
358 <p>
358 She didn't tell anyone else until two weeks before you were born. Her social worker, Liz
Brown, came to see you just after you'd been born and talked with Judith about her plans for
you.
358 </p>
359 <p>
359 Judith thought a great deal about what was best for you. When the idea of a family adoption
wasn't possible she began to talk with me about the sort of family that she wanted to become
your family.
359 </p>
360 <p>
360 I was the social worker who was with her when she chose Gordon, Caroline and Jason to be
your family. She liked the sound of them because they liked lots of cuddles and sounded as
though they enjoyed life together. Judith was particularly pleased because they already had
one little boy, as one of the things that was important to her was that you shouldn't be an
only child. She wanted you to be part of a loving family and knew that because of other
problems she would not be able to provide you with what she wanted for you.
360 </p>
361 <p>
361 I expect Caroline and Gordon have told you about their own disappointments about being
unable to have children of their own and how they'd already adopted Jason. They had come to
this agency for help to get another child and were waiting to hear. They were very excited
when they heard that Judith had chosen them and were keen to see you.
361 </p>
362 <p>
362 They first visited you at your foster carers, Beryl and Dennis' home on 13 May 2001, when
they were both bowled over by your smile. They quickly decided that they wanted to take you
home as soon as they could.
362 </p>
363 <p>
363 They were very keen to meet Judith and this meeting took place on 14 May 2001. I am sure
that your parents will have told you about it. We all sat around a large table and Judith
showed your parents photographs of her family and told them a bit about herself and they did
the same. She liked your parents a lot and thought that she'd made a good choice for you. It
reassured her to think that they were people who were loving to each other and to your
brother Jason.
363 </p>
364 <p>
364 After this meeting your parents took you home.
364 </p>
365 <p>
365 It was not an easy decision for Judith to make but she made it knowing that you were going
to a loving home.
365 </p>
366 <p>
366 Your adoption was arranged by the Family Services Directorate in Wakefield and the social
worker who knew your birth mother was Liz Brown. Sue Jones was the social worker who worked
with your adoptive parents.
366 </p>
367 <p>
367 The Adoption Order was made in the Leeds County Court on 3 December 2001.
367 </p>
368 <p>
368 With very best wishes for the future
368 </p>
369 <p>
369 Yours sincerely
369 </p>
370 <p>
370 Signed:
370 </p>
371 <p>
371 Social Worker or
371 </p>
372 <p>
372 Your usual working title
372 </p>
373 <h3 id="example_three">
373 Example 3 - Difficult and complicated birth family history - letter has been written in
sections to facilitate giving information to the child at different times.
373 </h3>
374 <p>
374 (Front Sheet)
374 </p>
375 <p>
375 <span class="bold">
375 JOSHUA'S SPECIAL BOOK
375 <br>
376 </span>
376 (To be kept in a safe place)
376 </p>
377 <p class="bold">
377 YOUR BIRTH:
377 </p>
378 <p>
378 You were born in Wakefield on Tuesday, 11 May 2001 at approximately 8.00 am.
378 </p>
379 <p>
379 Your birth weight was 3.3 kilograms.
379 </p>
380 <p>
380 When I visited the hospital with my team manager later that same morning I saw you beside
your mother's bed in your own cot. You were a very alert baby already aware of what was
going on around you, and with a plentiful head of mid-brown hair. Your birth mother, Mary,
told me that your birth had been a straightforward delivery without any complications.
380 </p>
381 <p>
381 She also told me that your birth father, John, had been with her in the delivery room when
you were born.
381 </p>
382 <p>
382 We discussed with Mary our concerns for your future care.
382 </p>
383 <p>
383 When Mary insisted that she would be leaving the hospital with you to return home with John,
in spite of all our advice that she should remain in hospital with you, we took the
necessary legal steps, via the Courts, to ensure that you remained in the security of the
hospital. Your birth mother, Mary, eventually returned home at about 5.00 pm and you
remained on the ward at the hospital.
383 </p>
384 <p>
384 Both Mary and John returned to see you on 13 and 14 May and saw you in the presence of
either the nurses or myself.
384 </p>
385 <p>
385 By the 14 May I had found a foster family who could look after you temporarily and I
introduced them to Mary and John when you were ready to move from hospital.
385 </p>
386 <p class="bold">
386 LEGAL BACKGROUND TO LOCAL AUTHORITY DECISION FOR YOU TO BE ACCOMMODATED BY FOSTER CARERS
FOLLOWING YOUR BIRTH, AND THE BACKGROUND CIRCUMSTANCES:
386 </p>
387 <p>
387 IMPORTANT. Joshua - this is likely to be an especially difficult and painful chapter for
you, and I think you should think of talking through its contents with your parents or some
other trusted person.
387 </p>
388 <p>
388 Since 2000 your birth mother Mary had been living with your birth father John. John had been
charged with very serious offences, which you can discuss with your parents or a social
worker when you are older.
388 </p>
389 <p>
389 When in March 2000 we received information that Mary was pregnant the we arranged to hold a
Child Protection Conference (involving amongst others the social workers in the Social
Services Department) in order to make a plan to protect you after your birth. Mary and John
attended this meeting and were aware of the conference decision that the local authority
would seek an Emergency Protection Order should Mary continue to live with John, whilst an
up-dated risk assessment was made regarding his attitude and intentions. In the event Mary
and John did not agree to this suggestion.
389 </p>
390 <p>
390 Following your birth on 11 May, it was explained to Mary and John, both by myself and by the
Guardian ad Litem (an independent person appointed by the Court), that the Emergency
Protection Order I had obtained from the Courts did not prevent Mary remaining with, and
caring for, you in hospital. However, she chose not to stay and left the same afternoon in
the company of John.
390 </p>
391 <p>
391 John denied that he was (or would be) a risk to your well being and proper development and
Mary supported him in this, always maintaining that he had been wrongly convicted in the
first place of these serious offences.
391 </p>
392 <p>
392 As a result of going before the Court charged with these offences, John spent 18 months in a
Young Offenders Prison.
392 </p>
393 <p>
393 Both your birth parents declined to co-operate in the psychological and other assessment,
which the local authority proposed to them. However, the first Court hearing in November
2000 was postponed when your birth father agreed, at the last minute, to undertake a "risk
assessment" before two selected experts (one of his choosing, one of ours) but in the event,
for his own reasons (which are unknown to me), he decided not to proceed.
393 </p>
394 <p>
394 When the Court reconvened in December 2000 the Judge gave his approval to the Care Order,
which gave us legal responsibility to secure your future with an adoptive family - namely
Eric, Stephanie and Ellen.
394 </p>
395 <p class="bold">
395 YOUR FIRST FOSTER PLACEMENT:
395 </p>
396 <p>
396 On 14 May, you left the hospital and I arranged for you to be collected by your foster
carers Lyn and Pete, who took you to their home in Wakefield.
396 </p>
397 <p>
397 Lyn and Pete looked after you very well, loving and caring for you as if you were their own
son.
397 </p>
398 <p>
398 From 17 May to 4 June Mary visited you for up to four hours every weekday morning at the
foster home. Later she found work and her contact with you was varied to one hour three
times per week in the evenings, but still at Lyn and Pete's home.
398 </p>
399 <p>
399 During her visits, Mary handled you very lovingly and caringly, feeding and cuddling you.
399 </p>
400 <p>
400 John saw you every fortnight for one hour at a Social Services office in Wakefield. These
contacts were always supervised by me. John was always pleased to see you, and often bounced
you on his knee and held your bottle if you needed to be fed. He seemed less spontaneous
than Mary, possibly because he saw you less often, and these contacts were always in the
presence of a social worker. The contacts continued until 20 October after which John
decided he could not come and see you again.
400 </p>
401 <p>
401 In your "Life Story Book" (put together lovingly by Lyn and Pete) you have photographs taken
of Mary, John and yourself during some of these contact visits.
401 </p>
402 <p class="bold">
402 MARY'S FAMILY AND EARLY HISTORY:
402 </p>
403 <p>
403 Mary, your birth mother was born on 4 October 1976. She was the second eldest of three
daughters. The family lived in an isolated "tied" cottage. Mary's father (your maternal
grandfather) worked long hours as a farm labourer and her mother (your maternal grandmother)
was a semi-invalid due to persistent ill health who would venture no further than the local
market town once a week to do her shopping.
403 </p>
404 <p>
404 These are the people in Mary's family:
404 </p>
405 
E620 The 'border' attribute is not allowed here:
The most common reasons for this error are the use of an old unsupported attribute, a new one which is not yet part of the specification being tested against, or the misuse of attributes for use with javascript. If the attribute is for use with AngularJS, then see the FAQ for more information. See the HTML Living Standard. <table border="1" title="mary family table">
406 <tbody>
407 <tr>
408 <td>
408 Her father
408 </td>
409 <td>
409 David
409 </td>
410 <td>
410 d.o.b. 29.12.46
410 </td>
411 </tr>
412 <tr>
413 <td>
413 Her mother
413 </td>
414 <td>
414 Ann
414 </td>
415 <td>
415 d.o.b. 13.10.48
415 </td>
416 </tr>
417 <tr>
418 <td>
418 Her sister
418 </td>
419 <td>
419 Jane
419 </td>
420 <td>
420 d.o.b. 13.9.83
420 </td>
421 </tr>
422 <tr>
423 <td>
423 Her sister
423 </td>
424 <td>
424 Liza
424 </td>
425 <td>
425 d.o.b. 24.4.80
425 </td>
426 </tr>
427 </tbody>
428 </table>
429 <p>
429 Jane is now married and living in Calderdale; Liza is still living with her parents.
429 </p>
430 <p>
430 Mary left home in 1994 and gave birth to her first child, Hazel, in 1995. She was at that
time being supervised by another social worker and was living in supportive lodgings. Later
she found a flat of her own. Hazel's father, Gavin moved in with her and they eventually
were married in April 1997. I actually knew Mary during this period and it was a very
difficult time for her in many ways. She lived with Gavin and Hazel in a very small upstairs
flat and due to the lack of any regular income there was always a shortage of money to buy
things in the family. As a result Mary had very angry arguments with Gavin. In the early
part of 2000 she decided to leave Gavin taking Hazel with her. After a few days she returned
to Gavin to leave Hazel with him. In January 2000 Mary and Gavin were divorced and Hazel
continued to live with Gavin.
430 </p>
431 <p>
431 Hazel is your half sister and she was born on 4 July 1995.
431 </p>
432 <p>
432 I always found your mother Mary to be a shy rather quiet person. As a young child she was
assessed at quite an early age as having special education needs and she went to a school in
Leeds, which she left at 16. Physically she was approximately 5ft 4ins tall and of slender
build. She had a fair complexion with short brown hair and blue eyes. Mary was not married
to John at the time of your birth but they have since married and still live together as far
as I know.
432 </p>
433 <p class="bold">
433 JOHN'S FAMILY AND EARLY HISTORY:
433 </p>
434 <p>
434 Your birth father John was born on 1 October 1977. He is the eldest of 5 children (three
younger brothers and one younger sister).
434 </p>
435 <p>
435 The family details are as follows:
435 </p>
436 E620 The 'border' attribute is not allowed here:
The most common reasons for this error are the use of an old unsupported attribute, a new one which is not yet part of the specification being tested against, or the misuse of attributes for use with javascript. If the attribute is for use with AngularJS, then see the FAQ for more information. See the HTML Living Standard. <table border="1" title="family details table">
437 <tbody>
438 <tr>
439 <td>
439 His father
439 </td>
440 <td>
440 Charles
440 </td>
441 <td>
441 d.o.b.11.11.55
441 </td>
442 </tr>
443 <tr>
444 <td>
444 His mother
444 </td>
445 <td>
445 Theresa
445 </td>
446 <td>
446 d.o.b. 23.9.57
446 </td>
447 </tr>
448 <tr>
449 <td>
449 His brother
449 </td>
450 <td>
450 Edward
450 </td>
451 <td>
451 d.o.b. 23.8.78
451 </td>
452 </tr>
453 <tr>
454 <td>
454 His brother
454 </td>
455 <td>
455 Robert
455 </td>
456 <td>
456 d.o.b. 19.4.82
456 </td>
457 </tr>
458 <tr>
459 <td>
459 His sister
459 </td>
460 <td>
460 Tracey
460 </td>
461 <td>
461 d.o.b. 7.8.84
461 </td>
462 </tr>
463 <tr>
464 <td>
464 His brother
464 </td>
465 <td>
465 Peter
465 </td>
466 <td>
466 d.o.b. 26.8.87
466 </td>
467 </tr>
468 </tbody>
469 </table>
470 <p>
470 The family used to live in Cumbria and it was whilst living here that the serious offences
for which John was sent to prison took place. At the time of the investigations, John's
brother Edward was also convicted for similar offences.
470 </p>
471 <p>
471 As a direct result Robert, Tracey and Peter were made subject to Place of Safety (Emergency
Protection Order) and went to live with foster carers. In December 1998 Care Orders were
granted to Cumbria County Council. Now they are 18 years of age Robert and Tracey are
independent. Robert has remained as a lodger in his foster home, and Tracey is living
locally in her own flat.
471 </p>
472 <p>
472 Theresa (your paternal grandmother) left Charles (your paternal grandfather) and their home
in early 1997. In November 1999 she remarried and lives near Leeds. Charles (your paternal
grandfather) has also entered a new relationship and lives in Bradford.
472 </p>
473 <p>
473 Your father John married Kate (d.o.b. 29.10.75) in early 1994 when he was still at school.
473 </p>
474 <p>
474 They had three children - your half brothers and sister
474 </p>
475 E620 The 'border' attribute is not allowed here:
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476 <tbody>
477 <tr>
478 <td>
478 Michael
478 </td>
479 <td>
479 d.o.b. 11.6.94
479 </td>
480 </tr>
481 <tr>
482 <td>
482 Harriet
482 </td>
483 <td>
483 d.o.b. 14.9.95
483 </td>
484 </tr>
485 <tr>
486 <td>
486 James
486 </td>
487 <td>
487 d.o.b. 17.8.96
487 </td>
488 </tr>
489 </tbody>
490 </table>
491 <p>
491 This family lived in Cumbria until January 1997 when Kate was advised by Social Services
Department to leave, and not allow John back into her new home.
491 </p>
492 <p>
492 Following his release from custody in July 1997 John had relationships with several young
women and it was necessary for Social Services Department to intervene and alert them to the
concerns regarding John.
492 </p>
493 <p>
493 In my contact with John I always found him very polite and well spoken. Physically he was
approximately 5ft 10ins tall broad shouldered and of a strong build. His complexion was fair
with brown eyes. John attended High School where he studied subjects to GCSE level. After
leaving school he worked in electronics as a trainee system engineer.
493 </p>
494 <p>
494 In his spare time he enjoyed clay pigeon and both target and "rough" shooting, and at
weekends he ran a successful mobile disco for local pubs and parties etc.
494 </p>
495 <p>
495 Joshua - I saw you on the day you were born and later I saw you very regularly whilst you
were at Lyn and Pete's house. I also saw you in the early stages of your placement with your
parents and after your adoption by them.
495 </p>
496 <p>
496 You were always a responsive alert baby. You smiled and vocalised a great deal. You seemed
to me to be very happy and lovable, eager to discover and get on with things. You walked,
talked and did everything young children should do, at the right time. There were no
concerns about your health or developmental progress to my knowledge.
496 </p>
497 <p>
497 Lyn and Pete loved you a lot and were very sad for a while when the time came for you to
move on to live with your parents.
497 </p>
498 <p>
498 I hope that the information I have given will give you some of the answers to the many
questions that may arise in your mind as you grow older and which you must discuss with your
parents and/or social worker.
498 </p>
499 <p>
499 The future "chapters" of your life are for you to write together with your parents and
Ellen.
499 </p>
500 <p>
500 Signed
500 </p>
501 <p>
501 Date
501 </p>
502 <p>
502 Social Worker or your usual work title
502 </p>
503 <p>
503 Also work base address
503 </p>
503 </div>
506 </div>
509 <div id="footer">
510 <div class="copyright">
511 <p>
511 <a href="http://www.trixonline.co.uk/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">
511 <img src="images/logo/trix-logo.png" width="75" height="75" alt="trix logo">
511 </a>
511 Copyright© signisgroup
511 </p>
512 </div>
513 </div>
514 </div>
515 </div>
517 </div>
519 </div>
520 <div class="container">
522 <div class="modal modal-wide fade" id="myModal" tabindex="-1" role="dialog" aria-labelledby="myModal"
aria-hidden="true">
524 <div class="modal-dialog modal-lg">
524 <div class="modal-content">
524 <div class="modal-header">
524 <strong>
524 Local Resources
524 </strong>
524 </div>
524 <div class="modal-body">
526 E960 [WCAG21 4.1.2 (A)] Do not use role=presentation|none or aria-hidden=true on a focusable element:
Using either of these on a sequentially focusable element will result in some users focusing on 'nothing'. A sequentially focusable element is an interactive element, or one with a positive 'tabindex'. See Fourth Rule of ARIA Use. <iframe src="https://proceduresonline.com/trixcms1/warringtoncs/doc-library/" title="Document library
popup">
526 </iframe>
528 <script>
528 </script>
528 </div>
528 <div class="modal-footer">
528 E960 [WCAG21 4.1.2 (A)] Do not use role=presentation|none or aria-hidden=true on a focusable element:
Using either of these on a sequentially focusable element will result in some users focusing on 'nothing'. A sequentially focusable element is an interactive element, or one with a positive 'tabindex'. See Fourth Rule of ARIA Use. <a href="#closepopup1" id="closepopup1" class="close" data-dismiss="modal" aria-hidden="true">
528 Close
528 </a>
528 </div>
528 </div>
528 </div>
528 </div>
528 </div>
530 <script src="js/val/test/jquery-1.11.3.min.js" defer>
530 </script>
531 <script type="text/javascript" src="js/highlight.js" defer>
531 </script>
532 <script src="js/iframe/iframeResizer.js">
532 </script>
534 <script src="https://maxcdn.bootstrapcdn.com/bootstrap/3.3.7/js/bootstrap.min.js" defer>
534 </script>
535 <script src="js/jqueryui/jquery-ui-1.9.1.custom.min.js" defer>
535 </script>
536 <script src="js/jquery.tocify.js" defer>
536 </script>
537 <script src="js/dropdowns-enhancement.js" defer>
537 </script>
538 <script src="js/scroll.js" defer>
538 </script>
539 <script src="js/custom.js" defer>
539 </script>
540 <script src="js/dmss.js" defer>
540 </script>
541 <script type="text/javascript"
src="https://cabbiepete.github.io/jQuery-Share-Email/js/jquery.tmpl.min.js" defer>
541 </script>
543 <script type="text/javascript" src="js/jQuery.print.js" defer>
543 </script>
544 <script src="js/jquery.shareemail.js" type="text/javascript" defer>
544 </script>
545 <script src="js/cookie-code/jquery.cookiebar.js" defer>
545 </script>
548 <a id="scrollup">
548 <i class="up">
548 </i>
548 </a>
549 <div id="background">
550 <p id="bg_text">
550 Trix procedures
550 </p>
551 <p id="bg_text_msg">
551 Only valid for 48hrs
551 </p>
552 </div>
557 <script type="text/javascript">
565 </script>
568 </body>
569 </html>